The Pooper

Usually when a man says he doesn’t like to argue what he’s really saying is I like to argue until I’m losing the argument or caught in a lie, then I don’t like to argue anymore. He will hang up, walk away or cut off all communication until he feels the coast is clear. Uncomfortable with women who are intellectually superior, his inability to effectively communicate only deepens his feelings of insecurity forcing him to resort to what he knows best – hurling insults. Desperate to feel power in the relationship he will bully, attack and demean you all under the pretense of it being a joke. He's not joking, if you think he is – try responding and watch him take off.  Like a mouse, he runs out of his hole, poops then runs back into his hole and hides. He will tell you everything he doesn’t like about you and the minute you try to respond he suddenly remembers he doesn’t like to argue and you’re an argumentative person. He will constantly tell you and everyone who will listen you argue too much when in reality he starts each and every dispute. Before you know it, all of your conversations become confrontations and no matter how logical you are, he’s forced you to reduce to his level because that is the only way he can communicate. So now both of you are hurling snide remarks and insults and guess what? He’s happy. He’s happy because you are finally communicating on a level he understands. Don’t do it.  This guy is a master at playing mind games and exploiting the weakness of others. It’s his Bonaparte. He already knows avoiding your conversation is a sore subject with you so by blaming you for altering the dynamics of the relationship; you focus on setting the record straight instead of the issue at hand. Feel like you’re going in circles?  You are but here’s the good news. You’re not crazy! You will be if you continue to put up with him the way he is but this relationship could work if he can overcome his insecurities. Is that possible? How badly do you want him?